Ok, so this evening, Beach Beauty and I had a discussion that was like none other, and it really got me to thinking. Over the past 11 and a half years, we have had conversations of this nature before, but not quite like tonight. To be honest I was a little disturbed, but not do to the topic, but more because of reality.
So, should I get to the point?
Well OK!
Every couple has this kind of conversation at some point. It is the, what will you do when I die conversation. Now, before you start making comments regarding our morbid nature, and saying things like, "hey, your young, you don't have to worry about that" remember that we are all human, and humans do in fact die.
Anyway...
We started having this conversation by what some people would call chance. It just kind of started, and before we knew it we were an hour into a topic that neither of us was really wanted to talk about, but we couldn't stop. During the conversation we talked about everything from burial arrangements, life insurance, to re-marry or not to re-marry, what we would do in the event of an untimely death, and many more things. In all truthfulness, it was rather nice. It was a truely intimate moment.
So, everyone knows that there is a but coming, so let's just through it out there.
BUT!!!!
It also got me to thinking pretty hard. I'm not scared of death, I'm not concerned with the wellfare of my children if I were to die young. I have somewhat of sketchy plan of attack if something were to happen to my Beach Beauty if she were to go at a young age. But what I was really thinking about was this. Have I been the best husband to my beautiful wife that I could have been, if I were to die today? Have I been the man that she needed me to be? Have I prepared her for a life without me? Have I taught my children the important things of life?
You see, I know that my Beach Beauty knows that I love her. At least I know I have verbally told her so. She seems to know my heart better than I do sometimes. But have I really been the best husband? Have I been the best example of Christ for her that I can be? If I answer these questions honestly the answer would be no. Not just because none of us measure up completely with the standard that the Lord has given us. But because I have been completely worried about myself more that I have been concerned with her or the kids.
I know, I know... some of you are saying "don't beat yourself up, we all have our moments of being selfish in relationships" and yes I know this is true, however God has given me a job. What is my job? It is to raise my family in love and fear of the Lord. I am to be the example of Christ to my wife and children. I am to teach my family how to worship. I am to be in constant prayer for my family, raising them up before the Lord as a priest. I am to protect them, not only from physical danger, but also from spiritual danger. I am to profess the Word of God to my family as a prophet.
And so, tonight I found myself in a moment of self evaluation. The evaluation was not pretty, because you see, when you rate yourself against God's standard you realize just how much you lack. So much in fact that there is not excuse. And to think, I thought I was doing pretty good when I rated myself against other people.
So before I close this post, I would like to turn what seems to be rather dismall and turn it into a challenge for the good of each of us. Fathers, each day set out to place the Word of God in a place of prominence. Reflect on Deuteronomy Chapter 6, and realize this: "The Lord our God; The Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your might." That is the first step. Let us live a life that is evidence of our love for God. So much that when people are talking about us at our funerals they can say in all honesty, "That man loved God with all of himself". But let's not forget the rest of this passage. As men, we are to be treauring the Word of God in our hearts and teaching it to our families, speaking of the word day and night, as we come and go, and even keeping it right before our eyes that we will not stray from it.
This is a daunting task. It will be difficult, because it is not the way of the world. However, as a husband, this is my job.
Do I love my wife? yes, of course I do! Do I love God with all my heart? I haven't yet. Will the love for my precious Beach Beauty and three sandy kids change if my love for God changes? You better believe it!
I want to be the best husband and father that I can be, and in order to do that, I have to be the best child of God that I can be first!
Will I die at a young age? I dunno. Will my kids always have both of their parents? We will have to wait and see. Will they know that their daddy loved the Lord? I pray that they will see that in me and follow Him in a better manner than I have.
So, let's leave the past behind. There is nothing we can change about the past, it is over, done with, and we can't fix it. What we can do however is affect the future. Men join with me and from this day forward be the man that God has designed us to be. Ladies, seek to be the reflection of God to your children, and a help meet to your husbands.
I know this has not been a really funny or light post, however, I pray that it has been a challenge.
Let me leave you with this: Press on toward the prize!! The race is not easy, it is long and treacherous, but the prize is well worth the sacrifice. The prize is eternity with God himself!
Until next time,
Clear skies, high surf and sandy feet!!!
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Times like these...really get me thinking!
OK, so before you say anything, I know that it has been a really long time since I have written a post. It has been so long in fact that I don't remember when I wrote last, or what I said in that post.
For those of you who actually read this blog, it may be important for me to note that tonight this post is more of a therapeutic writing, designed for my personal therapy then for your entertainment. However, with that being said, some of you may get some joy from this.
A few minutes ago, I was watching a video that Beach Beauty had posted on her facebook page, and I was taken by surprise by this touching video. It portrayed a grown man, speaking to his father, as he prepared to take his two young daughters on a camping trip. Typically most people would find the videos that come from these guys to be cute, and very funny, however tonight, I was struck with a different emotion. I was sitting in the bed watching this video and tears were welling up in my eyes. Why? you might ask. Because as I watched I was thinking about the things that my Dad and I would do as I was a kid, that were our little traditions. The things that we just did, because that was who we are.
For those of you that don't know, I lost my father 14 years ago, very suddenly. I was 19, and not really sure of what the future would hold, or more importantly, just how much of an impact my Daddy had on my life. I am now a Daddy to the three greatest kids anyone could ever ask for, and I pray that I am making the same kind of impact on my kids as Dad did on me.
So, in tribute to my Dad, I would like to share a few of the traditions that we had as I was growing up. The things that we did together, that were just for us, that made me the man that I am today.
Saturdays were always reserved for me and Dad. The day would always start very early, as we had to be at the church by 7AM for men's prayer meeting. Now, please understand that Dad was taking me to these meeting by the time that I was 4 years old. He saw to it that I was surrounded by Godly men, and these men, along with primarily Dad would teach me how to pray. They taught me how to be a real man. Not the macho man, but the man that relies on God, that fears God, and that has a real relationship with God. We would spend hours together sharing with each other the needs we all had, the burdens of our hearts, and the praises from the past week. Then we would come together on our knees in prayer. The prayer times were beautiful times where I heard men opening up their hearts to the Lord. There were several occasions that during these prayer meetings I can remember us crying together over the hurts or needs of one of the men in our group. It truly was a beautiful time. Now, when prayer time was over we all head over to one of the few locally owned restaurants in town, "OLDE TOWN" where we would enjoy a hearty breakfast that would prepare us for the day. Most days we would have the special, which was chip beef gravy on toast and home fries. As we ate we would discuss the work that was ahead for the rest of the day. Usually this work consisted of cutting wood for widows in the church, or others that needed firewood for the winter. Other times we may just go home and take care of the stuff that we needed to do around the house. Either way, there were very few Saturdays that didn't involve some sort of manual labor. You see, Dad knew that in order for me to grow into the man that I should be that I had to spend time around men that had it right. First and foremost I must have a relationship with the Lord that was not superficial, but genuine, and then I needed to be a hard worker, not for material gain, but for integrity's sake. This is who were are, it's what we do.
Saturdays are probably my most valued memory of times with my Dad. However there are other traditions that we had that are still so vivid in my memory. Such as our Christmas Eve tradition. Each Christmas Eve Daddy and I would spend a portion of the day, usually most of the day shopping for Christmas. Now you may think that this is not really a tradition, just a way of life, however I must say it was a tradition. Daddy didn't have to go shopping that day, the craziest day of the Christmas season, no, he wanted to. And not only that, but he wanted to include me in his time. It was special. We would go to the mall and take our time, in the midst of the bustling crowds. We would watch people as they frantically searched for the gift they had forgotten to buy, and usually we would start laughing. Eventually, sometimes after several hours, we would make the purchase that Dad had set out to make. Almost always, and I say this not remembering a time when it were not true, but to insure credibility among my sisters, we would buy the big present for Mom that Dad had purposefully waited to buy. One year it was a new recliner, another year it was a dishwasher, and one year the greatest gift that almost didn't happen was diamond earrings (that is a whole other story for another time). Now, Dad had a very purposed reason for setting out on these insane days to shop. It all went back to my parents first Christmas together. Dad had to plead with shop owners to even let him come in and buy some gifts for Mom, because he had literally not had a moment to shop for her. Each year he would tell me about that first Christmas, and we would set out to make a salesperson day. Dad would tell his story to the eager sales staff, and then let them know that he was going to purchase the item that he had been looking at for weeks, sometimes even months. He always made sure that a deserving person received a good sales commission on Christmas Eve. It was so wild to watch as Dad would talk and buy and then get outright gitty as he planned the big reveal for the next morning.
You see, Daddy showed me during these wonderful Christmas Eve shopping trips that he loved my Mom! He loved her, and he was so excited to show her just how much he loved her. He would plan a clever way to give her the present, which often times included a surprise visit by a fellow church member on Christmas morning. And whether he knew what he was doing or not, I know that he was showing me just what it means for a man to love his wife. Daddy showed me this time and time again, not only at Christmas time, but all year long.
So, now we come to Fathers Day this weekend. A time for us to honor the man that God placed as our Dad. I hope that this post has reminded you of the traditions that you and your Father had as you were growing up. If you are like me, and your Father has been gone for a while, then take the time this weekend to thank the Lord for the blessing that your Father placed on you while he was still with you. If your Dad is still with you, then cherish the time you have with him. I pray that you are able to spend some time with him this weekend, even if it means a phone call, and tell your Daddy how much you appreciate all he has taught you, and shown you while you still have time.
As I bring this post to a close let me encourage you to never take your Dad or Mom for granted. As we are young, we believe that our parents are indestructible. Nothing will ever happen to them, because they are our parents. Well things do happen, and time is short, so cherish them. The Bible is very clear about how we should regard our parents, God thinks so much of parents that he even used the third commandment to tell us "Honor your Father and Mother".
Thank You Lord, for giving me parents that raised me to honor, fear and revere you. Thank you for a Daddy that taught me how to be a Godly man, a good husband, and a Daddy. Thank you for a Mommy that nurtured me, trained me, and showed me what a Godly woman looks like. May I be able to be the Daddy that you have called me to be and given me the great example of in my Dad.
Till next time,
clear skies, high surf and sandy feet!
For those of you who actually read this blog, it may be important for me to note that tonight this post is more of a therapeutic writing, designed for my personal therapy then for your entertainment. However, with that being said, some of you may get some joy from this.
A few minutes ago, I was watching a video that Beach Beauty had posted on her facebook page, and I was taken by surprise by this touching video. It portrayed a grown man, speaking to his father, as he prepared to take his two young daughters on a camping trip. Typically most people would find the videos that come from these guys to be cute, and very funny, however tonight, I was struck with a different emotion. I was sitting in the bed watching this video and tears were welling up in my eyes. Why? you might ask. Because as I watched I was thinking about the things that my Dad and I would do as I was a kid, that were our little traditions. The things that we just did, because that was who we are.
For those of you that don't know, I lost my father 14 years ago, very suddenly. I was 19, and not really sure of what the future would hold, or more importantly, just how much of an impact my Daddy had on my life. I am now a Daddy to the three greatest kids anyone could ever ask for, and I pray that I am making the same kind of impact on my kids as Dad did on me.
So, in tribute to my Dad, I would like to share a few of the traditions that we had as I was growing up. The things that we did together, that were just for us, that made me the man that I am today.
Saturdays were always reserved for me and Dad. The day would always start very early, as we had to be at the church by 7AM for men's prayer meeting. Now, please understand that Dad was taking me to these meeting by the time that I was 4 years old. He saw to it that I was surrounded by Godly men, and these men, along with primarily Dad would teach me how to pray. They taught me how to be a real man. Not the macho man, but the man that relies on God, that fears God, and that has a real relationship with God. We would spend hours together sharing with each other the needs we all had, the burdens of our hearts, and the praises from the past week. Then we would come together on our knees in prayer. The prayer times were beautiful times where I heard men opening up their hearts to the Lord. There were several occasions that during these prayer meetings I can remember us crying together over the hurts or needs of one of the men in our group. It truly was a beautiful time. Now, when prayer time was over we all head over to one of the few locally owned restaurants in town, "OLDE TOWN" where we would enjoy a hearty breakfast that would prepare us for the day. Most days we would have the special, which was chip beef gravy on toast and home fries. As we ate we would discuss the work that was ahead for the rest of the day. Usually this work consisted of cutting wood for widows in the church, or others that needed firewood for the winter. Other times we may just go home and take care of the stuff that we needed to do around the house. Either way, there were very few Saturdays that didn't involve some sort of manual labor. You see, Dad knew that in order for me to grow into the man that I should be that I had to spend time around men that had it right. First and foremost I must have a relationship with the Lord that was not superficial, but genuine, and then I needed to be a hard worker, not for material gain, but for integrity's sake. This is who were are, it's what we do.
Saturdays are probably my most valued memory of times with my Dad. However there are other traditions that we had that are still so vivid in my memory. Such as our Christmas Eve tradition. Each Christmas Eve Daddy and I would spend a portion of the day, usually most of the day shopping for Christmas. Now you may think that this is not really a tradition, just a way of life, however I must say it was a tradition. Daddy didn't have to go shopping that day, the craziest day of the Christmas season, no, he wanted to. And not only that, but he wanted to include me in his time. It was special. We would go to the mall and take our time, in the midst of the bustling crowds. We would watch people as they frantically searched for the gift they had forgotten to buy, and usually we would start laughing. Eventually, sometimes after several hours, we would make the purchase that Dad had set out to make. Almost always, and I say this not remembering a time when it were not true, but to insure credibility among my sisters, we would buy the big present for Mom that Dad had purposefully waited to buy. One year it was a new recliner, another year it was a dishwasher, and one year the greatest gift that almost didn't happen was diamond earrings (that is a whole other story for another time). Now, Dad had a very purposed reason for setting out on these insane days to shop. It all went back to my parents first Christmas together. Dad had to plead with shop owners to even let him come in and buy some gifts for Mom, because he had literally not had a moment to shop for her. Each year he would tell me about that first Christmas, and we would set out to make a salesperson day. Dad would tell his story to the eager sales staff, and then let them know that he was going to purchase the item that he had been looking at for weeks, sometimes even months. He always made sure that a deserving person received a good sales commission on Christmas Eve. It was so wild to watch as Dad would talk and buy and then get outright gitty as he planned the big reveal for the next morning.
You see, Daddy showed me during these wonderful Christmas Eve shopping trips that he loved my Mom! He loved her, and he was so excited to show her just how much he loved her. He would plan a clever way to give her the present, which often times included a surprise visit by a fellow church member on Christmas morning. And whether he knew what he was doing or not, I know that he was showing me just what it means for a man to love his wife. Daddy showed me this time and time again, not only at Christmas time, but all year long.
So, now we come to Fathers Day this weekend. A time for us to honor the man that God placed as our Dad. I hope that this post has reminded you of the traditions that you and your Father had as you were growing up. If you are like me, and your Father has been gone for a while, then take the time this weekend to thank the Lord for the blessing that your Father placed on you while he was still with you. If your Dad is still with you, then cherish the time you have with him. I pray that you are able to spend some time with him this weekend, even if it means a phone call, and tell your Daddy how much you appreciate all he has taught you, and shown you while you still have time.
As I bring this post to a close let me encourage you to never take your Dad or Mom for granted. As we are young, we believe that our parents are indestructible. Nothing will ever happen to them, because they are our parents. Well things do happen, and time is short, so cherish them. The Bible is very clear about how we should regard our parents, God thinks so much of parents that he even used the third commandment to tell us "Honor your Father and Mother".
Thank You Lord, for giving me parents that raised me to honor, fear and revere you. Thank you for a Daddy that taught me how to be a Godly man, a good husband, and a Daddy. Thank you for a Mommy that nurtured me, trained me, and showed me what a Godly woman looks like. May I be able to be the Daddy that you have called me to be and given me the great example of in my Dad.
Till next time,
clear skies, high surf and sandy feet!
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